Do you find yourself constantly worrying about what others think of you? Are you worried that people might be judging you and what you are doing? If so, you may be worrying too much, as many of us do. It can be hard to stop worrying about what others think and to be more carefree.
However, there are some things you can do to start making it easier for you. In today’s society, it’s easy to get caught up in feeling worried about how you may look, or what others think of you.
If you recognize that you are someone who’s anxious about being liked, here are steps you can take to get back to a healthier relationship with others and with yourself.
- Accept that people will have opinions of you.
There’s no use in trying to avoid any and all judgment – it’s simply impossible. For better or worse, assessing other people is a natural part of social interaction. So, prepare yourself ahead of time for people to have their opinions.
A simple mental reminder that others will have perceptions of you – even some that may be inaccurate – can help you let incoming critiques roll off your back.
- Think about why you care.
Most of the time, the reason why we learn to worry so much is through our social norms. In this day and age, we are normally told that we should dress a certain way or act a certain way. It is popular to believe that anything that strays away from the ‘norm’ is too different. This is where we can start to worry too much and develop a fear of being judged by others.
Try and recognize why you care and what you care about so that you can start to understand it better. Know that it is not your fault or that there is anything wrong with you, it is the society that we have grown up in that contributes to this developed fear of rejection or judgment. Once you start to recognize this, it may become a lot easier to start accepting yourself.
- Let go of perfection.
It can be hard to shake the feeling that if you just get things right, you will be loved and admired. But this is a fruitless pursuit, not only because perfection is an illusion, but because what people think about you has more to do with them than with you.
Moreover, like yourself, people are too worried about themselves to notice anyone else. People go through life worrying about what others think and are usually not actually judging you or anyone else. Try and realize that everyone has their own lives and things that they have to deal with. They will normally be thinking about themselves and not you.
- Take back control over your own feelings.
Other people might have poor opinions about you, but that doesn’t have to translate into difficult emotions. They are not the same. While you can’t control how everyone perceives you, you can lessen your worry and anxiety over it.
Consider practicing some mindfulness techniques. Mindfulness is all about staying in the present and being aware of and accepting how you feel in that moment. Learning to be in the moment can help you cope with those unwanted feelings and thoughts.
- Understand that you can’t please everyone.
Have you heard the saying, ‘Better to be loved by few people you care about, then liked by everyone’? This rings true in this case. You need to know that you can’t please everyone, it’s just not possible.
There will be people who are always going to judge you, no matter what you do, it’s just how they are. As mentioned before, those people who matter to you will probably not judge you. And those who do judge you don’t really matter. Once you accept the fact that you can’t please everyone and people will still judge you, if that is the type of person they are, you can start to accept it and work on not worrying as much.
- Surround yourself with accepting, supportive people.
When you are around people who lift you up and help you to feel positive it can really help you when trying to stop worrying about others. People that care for you will be able to tell you your strengths and positive things about you that you may not see right now. This can really help you on your path to self-acceptance.
Having a close group of friends who are positive and honest can really help. You can ask them questions if you feel you may be judged and they will be open and honest.